1 year ago today, I hit a really low low. I was ideating, and disappointed to not have the supplies on hand that I was ideating about to actually execute the plan. With my husband's help, we called my therapist and the crisis line, then made our way to the ER. 1 year ago, tonight, … Continue reading An Anniversary
It’s been a little while, though not as long between posts this time as it has been in the fairly recent past. One of the stranger things about really working on healing, is, often, it’s hard to really express everything that’s going on. There has been quite a bit going on, though, and I’ll try … Continue reading Update Time
Well, it’s been quite some time since I’ve posted anything here. I’m hoping to line up a few different posts, because there is a lot I want to write about, I just haven’t felt like I’ve had the bandwidth to do much writing recently, even though I’ve been missing it. So, I might as well … Continue reading EMDR – My Experience
We all know how the saying goes. “If you want something done right, do it yourself.” In a lot of ways, I’ve lived that saying almost too well. Telling a perfectionist with trust issues something like this will result in an exhausted, drained wreck. AKA: me, most of my life. However, there is one area … Continue reading If You Want Something Done Right
You know that feeling after a really intense gym session, or some other more intense physical exercise (at least, more intense than your usual)? There's a couple, right? Like the right-after feeling, when you feel drained, spent, but really good about yourself. There's also the "next day" feeling. The "next day," at least for me, … Continue reading The Next Day
“This is a story all about how My life got flipped turned upside-down…” - DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince 10 years ago, my world felt upside-down. I had just left my ex-husband and moved back in with my grandparents. I was struggling to catch up on car payments, in order to try and … Continue reading Finding a Port in the Storm
"Back to life, back to reality," - Soul II Soul My apologies if this post feels a little disjointed or lacks a smooth flow; I’m prioritizing posting over perfection, which ties perfectly into some of the work I’ve been doing. When I first took leave from work, I had all these plans of grandeur, of … Continue reading Back to Reality
I haven’t done the best job in updating my blog the past few weeks, mostly because I’ve been focused on getting the most out of this Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Intensive Outpatient Program that I’m in (aka: Cog). It can be hard, draining work challenging distortions and beliefs that you’ve been forming and protecting yourself with … Continue reading Exposure Experiment and Mickey Ears
This series has taken what seems like forever to finish, not because I’m ashamed of what happened, or because I don’t want to talk about it, but because the story keeps continuing, and more and more keeps happening in life. I’ll briefly go over the last bit of my time in the hospital, as well … Continue reading First Time in Inpatient – And Beyond
I know that the posts in this series are coming farther apart than originally planned. The overall journey has continued to develop, and I'm hoping to have more time soon to catch up on posting and sharing everything that's been happening lately. In my last post, I left off when I was facing a decision … Continue reading First Time in Inpatient – pt 2
Writing Out My Storms 