Celebrating Victories #8

Wow! It's been about an eon since my last Victories post, and yet, so many victories have happened since then! Some I won't detail here, since they've been the topic of their own posts (like choosing to go inpatient and doing the Cog-IOP), but there are others that I'd like to go over, some big … Continue reading Celebrating Victories #8

Back to Reality

"Back to life, back to reality," - Soul II Soul My apologies if this post feels a little disjointed or lacks a smooth flow; I’m prioritizing posting over perfection, which ties perfectly into some of the work I’ve been doing. When I first took leave from work, I had all these plans of grandeur, of … Continue reading Back to Reality

Exposure Experiment and Mickey Ears

I haven’t done the best job in updating my blog the past few weeks, mostly because I’ve been focused on getting the most out of this Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Intensive Outpatient Program that I’m in (aka: Cog). It can be hard, draining work challenging distortions and beliefs that you’ve been forming and protecting yourself with … Continue reading Exposure Experiment and Mickey Ears

First Time in Inpatient – And Beyond

This series has taken what seems like forever to finish, not because I’m ashamed of what happened, or because I don’t want to talk about it, but because the story keeps continuing, and more and more keeps happening in life. I’ll briefly go over the last bit of my time in the hospital, as well … Continue reading First Time in Inpatient – And Beyond

A Brief Update

So, ever since giving myself the room to not follow an "every Friday" posting schedule, I've noticed that my posts have, well, trailed off.  I'm finding other things to do with my evenings and I'm not focusing as much on writing in general.  My first instinct is to get upset with myself, but, realistically, I … Continue reading A Brief Update

Celebrating Victories #7

It has been quite some time since I last did a victories post, since last year in fact. A big part of why I didn’t is because I haven’t been writing as much lately, what with all the challenges I had in December. So, let’s dive on in! First of all, and the biggest celebration … Continue reading Celebrating Victories #7

Potential and Positivity

Cherry blossom branches by Jason Leung

“Behold God beholding you…and smiling.” - Anthony de Mello, S.J. This past Monday, for the first time since the 14th of December, I went into the office for work. It was also the first time I’d worked at all since December 18th. Waking up to my alarm, getting dressed, packing up my work backpack with … Continue reading Potential and Positivity

Holidays, Anxiety and Invisible Cows

Slopes of Mauna Kea

If you ever go to the island of Hawaiʻi and visit Mauna Kea, the tallest mountain in the state, you’ll encounter a very strange sign. As you drive up the occasionally winding road towards the visitor’s center, which sits at an elevation of 9,200 feet above sea level, you may see a sign that would … Continue reading Holidays, Anxiety and Invisible Cows

Thoughts on thoughts

Content warning: In this post, I will be discussing suicidal ideation and attempts in the abstract. However, if these are topics that are triggering to you at this point, feel free to skip this post. If you are in crisis, there are several crisis line options on my resources page, or call the Suicide Hotline … Continue reading Thoughts on thoughts