Exposure Experiment and Mickey Ears

I haven’t done the best job in updating my blog the past few weeks, mostly because I’ve been focused on getting the most out of this Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Intensive Outpatient Program that I’m in (aka: Cog). It can be hard, draining work challenging distortions and beliefs that you’ve been forming and protecting yourself with … Continue reading Exposure Experiment and Mickey Ears

First Time in Inpatient – And Beyond

This series has taken what seems like forever to finish, not because I’m ashamed of what happened, or because I don’t want to talk about it, but because the story keeps continuing, and more and more keeps happening in life. I’ll briefly go over the last bit of my time in the hospital, as well … Continue reading First Time in Inpatient – And Beyond

First Time in Inpatient – pt 2

I know that the posts in this series are coming farther apart than originally planned.  The overall journey has continued to develop, and I'm hoping to have more time soon to catch up on posting and sharing everything that's been happening lately. In my last post, I left off when I was facing a decision … Continue reading First Time in Inpatient – pt 2

First Time in Inpatient

Well, it’s been longer than expected between posts, and, after what’s been going on over the past 4 weeks, what was planned to be a 2 post series may expand to 4 or 5. When we left off on my last post, I was riding in a wheelchair, accompanied by a security guard, going to … Continue reading First Time in Inpatient

When Invisible Cows Stampede

TW: Ideation & planning. If you feel the urge to harm yourself or others, please reach out for help. Back in December, I wrote a post about invisible cows, using it as a metaphor for unexpected stumbles and obstacles in my mental health journey. Well, last week, I was trampled by an invisible cow stampede. … Continue reading When Invisible Cows Stampede

Thoughts on thoughts

Content warning: In this post, I will be discussing suicidal ideation and attempts in the abstract. However, if these are topics that are triggering to you at this point, feel free to skip this post. If you are in crisis, there are several crisis line options on my resources page, or call the Suicide Hotline … Continue reading Thoughts on thoughts

Reaching for a Fresh Start

If you’ve been following my past few posts, it’s been pretty clear that I’ve been struggling. Struggling with keeping on top of my healthy habits, struggling with keeping up with my writing, struggling against the pulls of the constant undertow of depression. Well, I’m over it. I’m tired of struggling, tired of reacting to my … Continue reading Reaching for a Fresh Start

Rediscovering My Voice

Typewriter not in use

“A non-writing writer is, in fact, a monster courting insanity.” - Franz Kafka One of the reasons I started this blog is because I’ve missed writing. I went to college to get a degree in writing, and I haven’t used it at all. In fact, since I’ve graduated from college, I’ve perpetually struggled to get … Continue reading Rediscovering My Voice

Not Just Sad: What I Feel (or Don’t)

“Life is pain, highness.  Anyone who says differently is selling something.” - William Goldman, The Princess Bride One of the things I have noticed as my meds started to take effect, and even more so as I’ve started working through a lifetime of issues, is that I am crying more now than I have in … Continue reading Not Just Sad: What I Feel (or Don’t)